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We’ll win over 40pc of seats, Wash Wash tell Matiang’i

We’ll win over 40pc of seats, Wash Wash tell Matiang’i
Interior CS Fred Matiang’i. PHOTO/File

Small-scale money printers, popularly known as ‘wash wash’, have accused Interior Cabinet Secretary Fred Matiang’i of plotting to rig the August election.

The businessmen say the minister’s projection that 40 per cent of their members were likely to occupy elective seats after the next election was way off the mark and smacked of a motive to interfere with the polls.

Noti Pandia, the chairman of the Wash Wash Association of Kenya, said their members were extremely concerned about Matiang’i’s remarks and will soon take the necessary steps to secure their votes.

“We know our members are set to win far more seats than what the CS is suggesting. If we win anything less than 50 per cent of the positions, it can only mean someone played hanky-panky with the votes,” a furious Pandia said, waving a thick wad of freshly printed fake bank notes. 

He said the association’s members have the resources, the connections and the tricks to win up to 60 per cent of the positions in the August polls.

Pandia claimed the 40 per cent figure suggested by the minister was meant to hoodwink the public in preparation to interfere with their elections. “We have fielded candidates in every county, parliamentary constituency and ward and we are outspending and outmaneuvering everyone. So how do you expect us to win a paltry 40 per cent of the seats? Hiyo ni ukora!” fumed the Wash Wash association’s chair.

Besides taking good care of the voters, he said, their members were also taking care of broke rivals, many who had agreed to drop out of the race in their favour.

Pandia called on the international community and election observers to be vigilant to ensure Kenya’s democracy is not subverted by evil forces.

“The will of the money must prevail. Any plot to interfere with that must be resisted at all costs by all right thinking Kenyans and the international community,” he said.

Pandia also rallied like-minded candidates such as tenderpreneurs, drug peddlers, mchele merchants and other alternative entrepreneurs to join hands against any attempts to introduce mischief in the elections.

He said together, they make more than 80 per of the election candidates and their voice should be loud enough to scare off election rigging plotters.

“In fact, if we pool together our not unsubstantial resources, we can easily buy victory in these elections,” said Pandia, adding that no weapon raised against money can prevail. 

He said besides taking care of voters and opponents, they can also talk nicely to presiding and returning officers and make sure agents of their rivals are comfortable on election day. 

“We can play this game, too. Wakihesabu tutahesabu, wakiipa tutaipa,” he said. 

Political pundits agreed with Pandia that the ‘wash wash’ people and their drug peddling and tenderepreneuring cousins were expected to win more seats than what Matiang’i predicted.

“I think the minister was too conservative in his projection. Many independent opinion polls show that money is the biggest factor in the elections and these people have it in abundance,” said Kwenda Upange, who has been observing Kenyan elections for decades.

By press time, ‘wash wash’ operators, tenderpreneurs, drug peddlers and mchele merchants were expected to announce the formation of a formidable coalition against election rigging.

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