Geoffrey Rigathi Gachagua, that former District Officer who clocked just one term in Mathira as a Member of Parliament, somehow pulled a magic trick and became Deputy President.  

And when he did, he embraced the perks like a long-lost lover. Yes. He enjoyed them. Thoroughly. He savoured every last benefit the office had to offer.  

He exhaustively dined on public resources. What the rest of Kenya wanted was none of his business.  

Because he was “a truthful man.” Oh, sorry. He cared, of course, if you were from “his people” the so-called shareholders. 

In what could be described as the quickest political romance in recent history, the Mathira-born politician was impeached before he could even adjust his tie in power and get the right suit to fit him well.  

His impeachment was smoother than uji power on a cold evening. One might say he had not even finished his supper when he got booted out. Now, he has got no power. But count him lucky.  

His loving wife still treats him like her precious firstborn “boy child” and they have a beautiful family to fall back onto. 

After being kicked out of  Harambee Annex, he has been grabbing at any straw within arm’s reach looking for relevance in all corners.  

One minute he is spilling State secrets in low doses like Panadol.  

Other times, he is shouting and chanting youth slogans louder than the youth themselves. 

Man really thinks if you throw shade at the government, the youth will automatically make you their spiritual leader. He is in for a rude shock. 

The man recently pointed fingers at IG Douglas Kanja, crying foul over the State pulling his security team.  

But let us be honest; isn’t Rigathi still lucky?  

At least he has been walking around with people protecting him, his wife, his kids and even his property.  

Meanwhile, ordinary Kenyans are sleeping with one eye open.  

Women are being raped. Men are being kidnapped and tortured. Children are either killed or vanish without a trace. And no one is protecting them. Who guards the ordinary mwananchi? 

When he was chilling at the high table, did he forget that swallowing a coconut takes pure trust in your behind? It is a whole proverb from Naija. Not a joke.  

Now, just because he is feuding with the boss, he wants the rest of us – who are out here surviving unga prices, abduction, and femicide – to join, in a war whose cause we do not clearly understand. 

This is it, Rigathi had better square up like a man or hold an emergency shareholders’ meeting to sort himself. Because I can’t join the fight of people whose bank balances give me chest pains. 

Brethren, please note that we have reached that time again when fallen politicians suddenly discover they are “victims”.  

They dust off their Bibles and start quoting the Constitution. Yet, these same folks were dead silent when Kenyans were begging for justice. 

They looked the other way when the government they were serving was busy stepping on Kenyans.  

Now they are jobless and want our sympathy? Let’s not be too quick to say “Pole Woooiyeh”.  

We know this script. We have even seen this movie before, and spoiler alert: it does not end well. 

The falling-out between President Ruto and Riggy G, as well as Muturi, should not distract us.  

They were silent when injustice was everywhere. Now that they have turned on each other, let them deal with it like men.  

Our focus should remain on improving this country. Sincerely speaking, the rich only show up when it suits them.  

To my fellow youth; don’t get caught up. These politicians are all playing the same game. Just different faces. 

— The writer is a Sub-Editor with People Daily