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They say life begins at 40. And for Elizabeth Wangui, aged 40, she met her biological dad last weekend after years of stigma and ridicule.

November 7, 2020 will forever remain etched in the mind and heart of Elizabeth Wangui.

It was the day that she met her father, Peter Kung’u Kimani who had parted ways with her mother even before she was born.

For about 20 minutes, the two embraced each other, tears flowing freely at Magana area, Kiambu, which was their meeting point and the place where her father was born. 

 Coincidentally, his father mentioned he once worked in Ruai for three years, which was just a few kilometers from Joska, Kamulu where Elizabeth lived. Even so, their paths never got to cross.

Clan versus family dynamics

Yet the 40-year-old, had inquired several times on the whereabouts of her biological father, but her mother couldn’t give her an answer.

Her mother even introduced her to another man, who ended up being the step father, to calm her down, but Elizabeth’s heart wouldn’t rest and has not known rest until she met her biological father four days ago. 

“I did my research. I grew up in Miharati in Nyandarua and when I was young, I remember my uncles saying I resembled the man who sired me.

I also gathered that there was a woman near our home area who was married to my biological father and I knew of some her children as we were friends when we were young.

I searched for the contacts of one of them in order to trace my father,” narrates Elizabeth.

While my father’s son was a bit hesitant to furnish her with the cell phone number, he eventually gave her.

Elizabeth was able to contact her father whom she had never seen. “I was anxious of meeting him.

My greatest challenge was how my mother would react if she found out that I had met my father,” she adds

According to Elizabeth’s father, he couldn’t marry her mother because of clan reasons.

Elizabeth’s father comes from Agachiku clan while her mum, Zipporah Nduta comes from Ethaga clan, and they were not allowed to marry each other.

“So, when my father desired to marry my mum, he was advised that it was a taboo to bring an Ethaga woman home as his wife as it would pose a danger in their family.

So, Kung’u heeded to his parents’ advice and broke their engagement,” she recalls. 

He went ahead and married another woman who happened to be their immediate neighbour and as a result gave birth to two children.

They lived in Geta-Bushi, Nyandarua, which is a few kilometres from Miharati where  Elizabeth lived, but coincidentally they went to the same local primary school though they didn’t know they were related. 

Living without a father 

“People would tell us that we resembled, but we ignored it since we didn’t know that we belonged to the same father.

When I came to know that we had the same father, I looked for them and we exchanged contacts.

That’s how I came to know of my father’s whereabouts,” she says. 

Elizabeth recalls how tough it was growing up without her father as she was forced to live with her grandparents. Her schoolmates and neighbours would mock her. 

“While in secondary school, students would ask me baba yako atafika saa ngapi? I would feel frustrated since I didn’t know my father.

Living with my grandparents, my uncles would sometime come home drunk and tell me that they would beat me until I go and look for my father. It was a painful experience,” recalls Elizabeth.

Elizabeth believes this was the reason her mother opted to be a second wife to cover the shame.

After marrying her step father, Elizabeth’s mother became a staunch Christian urging her children to follow God’s word. This brought a lot of comfort in her heart. 

Her step father passed away in 2000. Elizabeth then came to Nairobi to live with her uncle who had a pharmacy along Jogoo Road.

It is here that she met her husband, Charles Hombe who would frequently visit the chemist.

Her humility, understanding and warm smile is what attracted her to him and the two decided to get married. 

Charles became a loving spouse who stood with her and comforted her during her search for her dad. The couple have two children.

Meeting her father made Elizabeth so emotional. “When I started communicating with my dad, I would get emotional and cry whenever I read his messages and apologies. But I am slowly regaining my grip,” says Elizabeth.

“I knew I had a daughter. But I also knew that her mother had gotten married to another man who was taking care of her as his daughter. So, I let bygones be bygones,” Kung’u says. 

But he is happy to be reunited with his daughter in his old age. “He welcomed me as his daughter and introduced me to his siblings.

He told them in case I came to them with any need, they should consider me as family,” Elizabeth said in conclusion.