One of the hallmarks of a successful relationship and marriage in particular is being considerate of each other.

Our human nature just naturally demands that we think about ourselves first.

We are, in short, selfish by nature. We are only concerned about our agenda and are not considerate of our partner’s needs.

It’s always about me, I and myself at the expense of our spouse.

Who knows, perhaps the sole purpose of marriage, the two becoming one, was to kill this monster within each of us?

Marriage calls for sacrifice, selflessness, of course, without losing ourselves in the process.

Being considerate about the following three things might just save your marriage. The first is your spouse’s feelings.

In the last argument you had with your spouse, did you consider how they felt?

Did you even stop to think about why they reacted the way they did, or did you just walk out, judging them for being this angry person?

Instead of complaining about how they reacted or asking them “sasa unalia nini?”, why not consider their feelings?

Find out why they are feeling that way, even if you don’t agree with them.

When we show consideration by taking into account our spouse’s feelings, we strengthen our friendship, and the connection deepens.

Secondly, consider your spouse’s needs.

Instead of complaining about how all they think about is sex, or want is conversation with you, have you stopped to consider that might be their need and how best it can be met?

When you complain about her denying you your conjugal rights, have you considered what needs of hers are not being met by you?

Paying attention to each other’s needs is crucial in us meeting those needs and thus ensuring that our relationships not only survive but thrive.

Thirdly, consider your spouse’s opinions.

Do you just make unilateral decisions because you are the “head” or because that is your domain, or because you bring more to the table than they?

Even if you are the “head”, or that’s your domain, or even if you are the one who brings in more bacon, it’s always good to involve the other person in your decisions.

Make them feel that their opinions matter and that their ideas and dreams are taken seriously. That way, they will feel part and parcel of you and the two will flourish as one.