Reading is supposed to enrich our lives. There is no area that humans need enriching more than their sex lives. Thing is, sengas, the aunties who used to teach the younger generation about sex are no longer a thing. And parents are more scared about talking about sex with their children than they are of their children getting pregnant or getting someone pregnant.

So, the biggest African sex talk tends to be around not getting pregnant or not dying from sexually transmitted diseases. The rest, you are left to figure out in your free time. So, people turn to TikTok and pornhub to learn about sex and how to do it right. Is it any wonder that half the population knows nothing about sex with the women lying back in bed and waiting to be serviced like dead cockroaches while the men muscle through sex like their favourite pornstars?

Well, I am here to tell you that it does not have to be this way. You can simply read up and try the tips you gather from the books on your partner.

Thing is, the key to great sex is communication, some things will work while others will not but the only way to be sure if it is working or not is to communicate.

So here are 10 books to get you off. Come and read them, or the other way round. It does not really matter.

1. SEX FOR ONE
   This book explores the joy of self-loving. It is the one book you will need to read if you want a masters in masturbation.
   It is written by a renowned sex educator and feminist and is specifically designed to help vulva-owners take pleasure into their own hands. If you are a penis-owner, you will learn a lot about your vulva-owning partner as well.
2. QUEER SEX
   Written by a transgender activist, this book explores sex, desire, and dating with leading figures in the trans and non-binary community.
   It’s funny, poignant, empowering, and shows that all trans folks deserve a happy, beautiful, and fulfilling sex life. Everyone deserves sexual happiness, even the queer.
3. MATING IN CAPTIVITY
   This book by Esther Perel shows that sex can still be exciting even in captivity or what we call marriage. Why is it that sexual frequency often goes down the longer we are with our partners?
   This book will answer this and more questions that you may have around the relationship between sexual desire and domesticity, and tell you what it takes to bring that lust back into your relationship.
4. LOVE WORTH MAKING
   This book is a guide to having great sex in a monogamous relationship.
   Written by renowned sex therapist Stephen Snyder, the book taps into his 30 years as a sex therapist to help you keep sexual inspiration alive in a committed relationship.
5. TONGUE TIED
   Tongue Tied: Untangling Communication in Sex, Kink, and Relationships is a communication guide for talking to your partner(s) and dates about threesomes, kink, BDSM, and more.
   Stella Harris believes that you should not settle for mediocre sex. All you have to do is communicate with your partner and include more than vanilla flavours and styles into your sex life. The author teaches readers how to identify their needs and feel empowered in communicating about them. It’s a guide filled with exercises, tools, and personal examples. Here is the guide you needed to start tying up and whipping your partner with a leather belt.
6. SHE COMES FIRST
   Ian Kerner the author of this book shares tricks to pleasure your woman. He emphasizes on oral pleasure, one of the trickiest sexual escapades that humans ever invented. If you have ever wondered how to please her, this is the answer you have been looking for. This is probably the book you need to gift your man if he is falling short in the cunnilingus department.
   Ian Keller is an author you should read and often too, as one of his other tomes Be Honest—You’re Not That Into Him Either is quite thought-provoking.
7. HE COMES NEXT
   This is Ian Keller’s follow-up to She Comes First. It seeks to guide women around the penis, balls and male pleasure.
   It is the book that you buy if you are invested in your male partner’s pleasure or you gift your woman if she is completely clueless as to how to please you.
   It is written in a witty voice and is an easy read.
8. THE PENIS BOOK
   Dr. Aaron Spitz who served as an assistant clinical professor at UC Irvine’s Department of Urology for 15 years becomes your best friend as he fearlessly guides you through the hairiest and the scariest questions in this book.
   An unflinching, comprehensive guide to everything from sexually transmitted infections to the science of blood flow, this book features an easy-to-follow holistic five-step plan for optimum penis health, including plant-based eating recommendations, information on some penis-healthy foods, and suggested exercises for penis wellbeing.
   Useful to men and women alike, The Penis Book is a one-stop shop for the care and maintenance of the penis in your life. You after all need a healthy penis to have sex.
9. THE SEXUAL HEALING
   JOURNEY
   This book by Wendy Maltz seeks to help those who have been sexually abused recover from the trauma associated with sex and their bodies. Here, the author helps readers heal from their past, improve their relationships and find joy in sex again.
   Written by a psychotherapist and certified sex therapist, it takes readers step-by-step through the recovery process.
10. URBAN TANTRA
    Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century is a modern book that seeks to make sacred what people have cheapened and abused more than even a handshake.
    Acclaimed sex educator Barbara Carrellas combines erotic how-to and pleasure-centered spiritual wisdom in this in-depth guide to sex. This book is for anyone searching for the great cosmic orgasm.